Major Overhaul

This afternoon I started reading my book by Otto Jespersen, and I decided that there's no way I could not study linguistics and still be entirely happy. So I pretty much decided in a period of about twenty minutes that I am not going to major in Spanish Teaching after all, but I will major in Linguistics instead, like I had originally planned. I still may end up teaching Spanish, who knows, but I think that it will be more enjoyable and more intrinsically motivational to study Linguistics than it would be to focus all my time on Spanish. I don't know exactly what I want to do with a degree in linguistics, but I don't have to know that right now. I might teach English as a second language, I might teach Spanish, I might go work for the CIA or be a sports column writer in Florida, I don't know. And right this minute, I don't care either. What I would really like to do more than anything is study and research and conduct so many surveys and studies that my name comes up on Google when you type in "Linguistics." Call me crazy, but I'd rather be a professor of Linguistics than a middle school Spanish teacher. And if I go to graduate school, which I hope to be able to do, it won't really matter what my Bachelor's degree is in anyway. So I'm going to study what I want to study most, and leave the rest unsettled for now. So I just scrapped my whole plan for the next four years, and I'm starting over, again, and I think it will be much better for me in the end. In twenty minutes I decided something that may have a huge impact on the rest of my life, and at the very least will have an impact on my happiness while at BYU. I am so excited to start school again, I can't even explain how much I've missed studying there. In the past week, I've made so many major life decisions that if I continue at this rate, I will probably be living in Ukraine by the end of January working in a hospital or something. Well, maybe not, but that's the best way I can relate how I feel. I feel so inadequate with words sometimes. I was wondering today how many words I actually know, and would I be able to communicate my thoughts more clearly with a larger vocabulary, or do I just need to work on organizing my thoughts better using the words I have already learned. What am I missing here? Why can't we all just be telepathic? That would be so nice, but I guess then there wouldn't be a linguistics program at any university, and that would dash all of my hopes and dreams too. I just can't win.